Cross my Heart (Iris Boys Book 4) Read online

  Grayson’s face was sweaty and red as he jerked his entire body up using the pull-up bar attached to the doorway into the walk-in closet adjoining the somewhat small bedroom. He pulled up several more times, holding his breath and then grunting when he lowered and released it.

  He dropped down to the ground and I watched on trembling legs as he turned around and bright blue eyes met my gaze. “What do you want?” he snapped.

  I stared back at him, my eyes following the rivulets of sweat sliding down his skin. Dressed in only a thin pair of basketball shorts, Grayson grunted when I didn't answer and padded around me, heading for the hallway. As he passed, my nostrils were filled with the smell of him—the rich, dark, masculine scent of him. In the kitchen, the sharp sound of plastic ripping made me jump. I turned and moved back, following the noise again until I stood at the counter as Grayson opened a new container of protein powder. I frowned.

  "Why are you working out so much?" I asked. It seemed like a safe question. Not exactly the reason Texas had shoved me into the lion's den and left me to pull the thorn from its paw, but it would do.

  Grayson grunted something unintelligible.

  I stepped closer. "What?"

  He sighed, putting down the cap from the container and turned to meet my eyes. "Because it gives me something to do," he said.

  "Why don't you get a job?" I offered helpfully. Grayson had redirected his eyes back to scooping out the white powder into a water bottle, but when I spoke he glanced to the side and raised a brow. I flushed. "I mean, I know you're going out with the guys and all that,” I said quietly. Something I had also been meaning to ask him about, but perhaps not immediately important. “Maybe you could, I mean, I could help you—"

  Grayson finished filling his bottle with what he needed and re-screwed the cap on the container. "Don't worry about me, Babydoll," he said, interrupting my awkward diatribe. "I'm fine."

  But that was just the thing..."You don't seem fine," I admitted, worrying my bottom lip.

  Another grunt, followed by a shove as he crammed the protein powder container into a cabinet, was my answer. I huffed and as Grayson moved to step past me, I reached out and put my hand on the bulging muscle of his bicep. Blinking, I stared down at it, squeezing slightly. Holy hell had he started to pack on the muscle. A couple of months ago, he’d been just as muscular, but in a more lean, lithe way. Now, I could feel the muscles hardening under his skin. He had definitely put on some weight since he moved in and none of it was fat. Could anyone really pack on this much in two weeks? I wondered. Or had he been working out before he moved in too? He coughed to catch my attention and smirked when I flushed. Snatching my hand away, I clasped them both behind my back to keep from reaching for him again.

  "You need to get out," I stated. "You're always in here or with the guys. You need to get out and go do something."

  "Are you offering to take me out, Babydoll?" he asked, the one side of his mouth still lifted. The way it curled even more, however, made the question more sardonic than genuine. I found myself meeting his gaze with a serious expression.

  "As a matter of fact," I said, tipping my head back, "I am."

  His smirk disappeared, followed by a rise of surprise across his features. "You're serious? A date?"

  My heart jumped. I hadn't exactly meant a date, but I guess...whatever got him out of the house. Texas was worried about him and even Marv was being nice to him. The guys knew how I felt now. They had accepted Grayson—for the most part. "Sure," I answered. "A date. Tonight. Be ready at seven pm. You and me, we're going out."

  "Oh?" Grayson set his water bottle to the side—filled with a murky brown liquid that sloshed against the sides. I grimaced at it, but he leaned close, distracting me. Grayson placed a palm on either side of me, caging me in and ratcheting my heart rate up even more. I gulped. "And just where are we going?" he asked.

  "I-it's a surprise," I lied. Then again, technically it wasn't a lie. It was a surprise...for both of us—since I had no clue what we were gonna do or where we were gonna go.

  "Uh huh." His naked chest brushed against my shirt and the smell of hot, sweaty Grayson drifted up to me. My thighs clenched. One night with Marv had set me on high alert. Even the slightest of brushes seemed to scramble my thoughts. Of course, it only happened when I was in close quarters with one of the guys—Grayson included, obviously. The fact that Grayson and I were alone and in relative privacy where no one at the house could hear us only heightened my awareness of him, and I suspected that he knew as much. His breath touched my cheeks. "And just who is driving on this trip?"

  "I will," I offered. "We can take your car."

  He laughed, pulled away and left me sagging against the countertop. Was I disappointed? No. Maybe. Okay, a little bit. "You're not driving my car," he said. "I'll drive. I'll come get you at seven pm as long as you leave me alone for the rest of the day."

  I eyed him. "Promise?"

  He nodded, snatching up his water bottle with the gross protein liquid in it. "Count on it."

  "Alright," I said hesitantly, moving towards the glass doors that led outside.

  "See you tonight," he called over his shoulder.

  The entire way back to the house—all two minutes of the walk—I wondered if I had missed something. When I entered, brushing off a few raindrops from my shoulders and hair, Texas was there. "How'd it go?" he asked.

  "Uh, good," I replied absently.

  "What happened?" he pressed, moving in closer until he was right next to me. Concern shone in the depths of his dark brown eyes. "What did he say?"

  "We're going on a date," I said. "Tonight."

  "A date?" he repeated.

  I nodded.

  "Where are you going?" he asked, curious rather than upset.

  "I have no freaking clue." But I'd have to figure it out and quickly. I was more than a little sure Grayson knew that this was only to draw him out, but I'd make this date one of the best I could. Anything to keep him from falling back down into the depressed hole he'd been in since we got back from Lander. I wondered if it had anything to do with college. Had he wanted to stay? But no, Knix and Marv had told me that the falling out he’d had with his mother was the primary reason. His crazy, stalker, money-hungry mother. Yes, I was almost certain she was the cause of his continued negative mood. I only wished there was something I could do to lift his spirits in a more permanent way—short of finding her and demanding that she stay the hell out of his life.

  Texas tried to ask me a few more questions, but I had planning to do. Turning abruptly, I pressed a quick kiss to his lips, both startling him and shutting him up—a two for one, as it were. Despite the suddenness of my kiss, he returned it wholeheartedly. Texas' tongue tangled with mine, causing my breath to catch as I pressed closer to him. I had only meant for it to be a quick, chaste kiss. I wasn't disappointed in the least that it had ended up being more.

  When we finally managed to pull away from each other, I was panting and Texas was looking at me with partial surprise and partial desire, his lids heavy over his eyes as he watched me. "I'm gonna go take a shower," I said, unsteadily.

  Texas looked like he wanted to follow me, but he stepped away with a rough sigh, moving back so that I could pass by and head down the hall. I peeked over my shoulder on my way to the bedroom, half expecting him to be following anyway. He wasn't, and I couldn't decide if I was disappointed or not. That seemed to be my streak today—get close to one of the guys, get worked up, and then walk away. We were going to have to break this cycle, and soon. I didn't know how much longer I could stand this limbo I had with everyone but Marv. Even though it didn't feel like limbo with the others, it would be until we solidified where we were at. Maybe tonight, I'd do that with Grayson.

  One step at a time, I reminded myself. One step at a time.

  Chapter 2

  Grayson was quiet as he drove through the streets of North Charleston, expertly steering the car through stop lights and around corners. Both of us h
ad dressed more or less dressy-casual. I clenched my hands in my lap as I peeked at him out of my peripheral vision.

  "I did have a plan," I said for what felt like the tenth time since we got in the car.

  The corner of his mouth closest to me lifted. "Sure you did," he said, the humor clear in his tone.

  “I did,” I insisted. Sure, it had been a slap-dash, poorly put together plan, but I’d had one. Dinner. Dinner was always good for a date. Maybe a movie? I peeked at him out of the corners of my eyes. He didn’t seem like he was in the mood for a movie, though. "Where are we going?" I asked as he turned onto the interstate and slid across two lanes to the farthest and fastest lane.

  "You'll see when we get there," he said.

  I grumbled but sat back against the seat, staring out over the flashing glow of headlights as the sun set on the horizon in front of us. "You better not be taking me anywhere to kill me and bury my body," I said. "Marv would kill you."

  Grayson shifted in the driver's seat and muttered something in response, so low it was hard to catch it, but it sounded something like, "He's not the only one."

  I cracked my neck and reached for the radio. "Nope." Grayson vetoed the very first station I turned to.

  "What's wrong with it?" I asked.

  "I don't do pop. Pick something else."

  I changed it again.

  "No."

  "It's coffeehouse music!" I snapped. "It's not bad."

  "It's elevator music. Something else." After another turn, he shook his head. "Not classical either. That's just another brand of elevator music."

  "Well, what do you want to listen to then?" I demanded.

  "You." His answer was so abrupt, my fingers froze on the radio knobs. "Talk to me," he said. "I just want to hear you talk."

  Sitting back against the seat, I bit my lip and sighed. "What do you want me to say?" I asked. "I don't know what to talk about."

  "Why'd you come to me today?" he asked.

  "Texas."

  Grayson's sharp, ice blue eyes snapped to my face briefly before he flicked his blinker and directed the car into the middle lane as we approached an exit. "Texas?" he repeated sounding almost disappointed.

  I nodded. "Texas is worried about you," I admitted. "He likes you and..." I looked out the window again, not wanting him to see the flush that rose to my cheeks as heat suffused my face. "And I was worried too. You haven't been yourself lately. You never come out of the pool house unless it's to go somewhere with one of the guys—usually to work with Knix or Marv. You hang out with Texas only when he's working too. All you seem to want to do is work and exercise and sleep. It's not healthy."

  "Are you saying I'm a workaholic?" he asked, amusement in his tone.

  I shrugged. “I mean, if the shoe fits.” I licked my bottom lip and huffed. “I know something’s bugging you,” I said. “You aren’t normally like this.”

  “What am I normally like?” he asked.

  “An asshole.”

  He scoffed.

  “It’s true,” I insisted with an eye roll. “You’re sometimes pompous and overblown. You’re a master at douchery—”

  “Is that even a word?” he interrupted through a chuckle.

  “If it’s not, then I’m making it a word.” I turned towards him, pressing my back against the car door. “But you haven’t been yourself lately. Your spark is gone. You’re not sarcastic or rude—well, you’re still rude, but it’s not the same. You don’t tease me as much. I…” I missed it. I missed him. I missed our witty banter and his crazy mystery. I felt like I had found out everything there was to know about him, but as soon as that happened, the facade had fallen away, but I wondered if it had been a facade at all.

  He sighed then, flicking his blinker again and sliding into the exit lane at last. "I'm fine," he said quietly. "I'm just dealing with something right now. Working through it the only way I know how—through keeping busy."

  “If you need to keep busy,” I offered, “I can help.”

  Tension seeped into the interior of the car as I realized the true depth of my words. A blush bloomed across my cheeks and I stuttered. “I-I mean, I can help you to get through it. You’re um—issues. I can try to…” A blathering idiot was what I was. I groaned and turned, letting the back of my head land on the seatback with a thud.

  He chuckled. “You are helping,” he admitted quietly.

  I turned my face and looked at him. There were divots in his forehead, either from stress or concentration as he drove, I wasn't sure. But there was also a lightness about him tonight, as though the stress was seeping away. I hoped that was the case, even if it was only for a little while. "I'm glad you came with me tonight," I admitted.

  "Yeah?" he asked, slowing the car to a stop.

  "Yeah." I reached for the hand he had dangling in the center of the front seat, taking it in mine. "I know things are complicated, but I want you to know that you can come to me if you need to."

  Grayson stopped at a red light and turned, taking in my expression. "When we met, you thought I was an asshole," he reminded me.

  I smiled. "You still kinda are," I replied, causing him to chuckle as the light turned green and he pressed on the gas. “I’ll actually feel a lot better when you go back to being that asshole.” He squeezed my hand back, sending fluttering butterflies through my stomach. "I think I realize why that is."

  "Why I'm an asshole?" he sounded confused. I nodded earnestly. "Okay, and why's that?" The way he asked it made the question a challenge.

  I smirked, refusing to give in. "If I told you that," I replied, "you'd argue with me and tonight isn't about arguing. You're taking me on our first date. No fighting or arguing allowed."

  That startled another chuckle out of him, and I grinned. This was the most Grayson had smiled or semi-laughed in several weeks. I wanted to do a fist pump. "You're one of a kind, Babydoll," he said lightly, making my grin grow, “and you're taking this dating several guys at once thing with grace."

  I grimaced but was secretly glad that he thought that. I had never thought of it before, but there weren't exactly a whole lot of models for this kind of relationship. Sure, there were TV shows that mimicked the idea, except with one guy dating or married to several women. Those TV shows were a joke, though. Society watched and laughed and judged. It was a little easier for people who loved one person. Even if that person was the same sex. There were same-sex couples all over television and in real life. There were models for them. But...for what we had? Not so much. And when there were models for our kind of relationship, from what I had researched on the web, it wasn't exactly accepted by society.

  I was trying to take this relationship day by day, but honestly...I worried. I worried about how we would be received. I worried about what people would think—even if I shouldn't. I had already lost one friend, though not because of the relationship. Even though I had lost Erika and found Lizzie, sometimes, it still felt like all I had were the guys. My mom, much better now with her new medical care, was accepting, but I hardly ever saw her. Once a week, if that. What would I do if this relationship lasted? Would I be introduced to Marv's family as his girlfriend? Would any of them want to get married?

  My thoughts had catapulted me into depths that I wasn’t quite ready to consider, and I was thankful when Grayson interrupted them—though I jumped when he spoke.

  "We're here." Turning, I realized we had already pulled into the parking lot of a two-story brick building with an outer wooden rim at the top. The car was off, the engine quiet. "You okay?" he asked. "You were quiet for a hot minute there."

  "Yeah." I squeaked when I spoke too quickly and had to clear my throat. "Yeah," I repeated. "I'm fine. Where are we?"

  He tilted his head at me, cool eyes assessing. "Wait there," he ordered. "I'll come around to get you."

  "I can get the—"

  "This is a date, Harlow," he said. "Let me get your door." With that, he opened and shut his door sharply. I watched him stride around the front of
the hood as I unclipped my seatbelt. Grayson popped open the passenger side door, holding his hand out for me to take.

  Before, it hadn't yet felt like a real date, but with the way he was acting, it made me realize just how serious this was. We were alone for a change, and it wasn't for work and it wasn't because the others didn't know. A shiver raced up my spine as I took his offered hand

  "Thank you,” I said with a small smile.

  Grayson smiled and released me to close the door before he took my hand once more, tugging me behind him as he headed for the building. An old, slightly rusted metal sign hung above the entrance. It read: Cozy Coconutties Welcome.

  A tall, voluptuous woman with her blonde and green hair pulled into a ponytail greeted us at the hostess stand. "Welcome to the Coconut Hut." She smiled brightly, reminding me of Lizzie with her own crazy colored hair and bubbly personality. "Two?"

  Grayson nodded. "Can we have a table on the roof?" he asked.

  My hand squeezed his as I looked up. "Of course," the hostess replied brightly, leading the way.

  Grayson's face remained passive. He didn't look particularly happy, but neither did he look angry or any other combination of upset. He simply looked content. He was becoming a very difficult person to read, which I hated, but at the same time, it still left a bit of mystery too. I was always wondering what he was thinking.

  The rooftop section of The Coconut Hut was nothing more than a few wooden tables scattered around, lit with tiki torches across the sides of the building as well as the lights from the outdoor bar to the side. The chairs were slightly damp from the earlier rain, but I didn't really mind. I was glad I had worn a longer dress for this. I smoothed down the back after wiping the seat as best I could and sat down. Grayson sat across from me and ordered drinks for us both.